Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
he told me he saved a turtle in the middle of the road.. i told him id be over in ten minutes...i mean he deserves a bj after that.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
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And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
He ripped off his socks and ran around the basement barefoot. His feet turned black. Then he chugged Parmesan cheese. He chugged dry cheese dude.
Sexting Captain while emailing my eharmony match about my low key weekend is hard.
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The old guy next door tried to get me to go to his apartment for shots formoonshine. =-0
If that weren't so sketchy I would encourage it
Yeah it was almost as sketchy as a white panel van pulling up offering candy
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
Can u pick up some lemons on the way? I have Tequila and a sore throat..I need them for both
Optimism doesn't exist before 2pm nor do any other emotions.
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