If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I should have known our good time had gone to shit when his ankle bracelet started flashing.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
Had the longest conversation today with a potentially homeless cuban woman about mind control.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
...this is why fuck buddies should be only for grownups.
i don't want him to see me in a bathing suit.
hasn't he seen you naked?
well yeah, but it's different in a bathing suit.
We were peeing side by side on the riverbank together and I felt like nothing brings you closer than drunken riverbank urinating so I caught her a friendship frog to wipe with since we left the tp in the canoe.
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