I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
I have had it with that bitchy sack of crazy. Iam done!
i actually just woke up with a lampshade on my head. god damn cliches.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
It was scary, we all screamed. Never make mimosas in a car.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
It was like a Thanksgiving meal, which you spend 8 hours cooking, and the family wolfs down in 20 minutes. All that flirting and build-up for like 90 seconds of pumping and he was gone in a flash, never to be heard from again.
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
I just watched videos of people getting puppies and crying, I cried too. Definitely still drunk
Randomize
