1:57 a.m. Where did you go???
1:58 a.m. What are you doing? I want to go home with you, why aren't you responding?
2:11 a.m. Heading back to your place now, will you let me in?
i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Dude, I woke up in the middle of the night and your room mate was just standing there at the foot of the bed, watching us sleep.. you don't remember me shaking the shit out of you to tell you this?!
This could explain the reason why I've been finding his clothing and keys scattered in random parts of my room..
AND THIS DOESN'T WORRY YOU?!
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
Just got arrested at PF changs. Happy New year, China
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
You said "this is only my eighth drink" with like 6 separate drinks
In my dream I had to eat so many peanut butter and Nutella sandwiches
i woke up face planted on your ottoman..thanks for letting me sleepover
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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