Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
I went from sexy to sloppy in a matter of minutes
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
Didn't get carded at the bar. We're getting wasted and then walking over to Bass Pro Shops to watch the indoor ducks swim around. And possibly buying a tent.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
So the other day we finished having sex and he literally said "what are we going to do about your vagina?" Like, I hadn't even dismounted him yet.
just turned another straight guy gay. Goddamn the church must hate me
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize