Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
I'll get you through man, I'll be your fairy godmother with better prescription drugs
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
apparently they stopped looking at spit swabs under the microscope in bio ever since they found a sperm cell in one students sample
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
I FINALLY GET TO MASTURBATE. SO EXCITED.
It was so small.
Tiny. Got to love sexting. Imagine finding out the old fashioned way.
She's the prison bitch to my Martha Stewart.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
