I'm gonna have a badass scar
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
I just found out she jerks off to lesbian porn too honest to god
you wouldn't believe how perfect a match this is its scary
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
He was talking up his golf swing like other guys talk up their dick. Is this adult dating or just another flavour of douchery?
New fuck buddy and long time fuck buddy are carpooling home for thanksgiving. #10hrconvoaboutmyblowjobskills
She's passed out with a slice of pizza between her boobs should I just eat it and leave
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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