You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
i must have dtf stamped on my forehead
yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
frozen peaches as icecubes. vodka Sundays just got wayyyy better
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
he told me to hold it and try to write my name in the snow and it seemed like a bonding moment because neither one of us had ever done that before. i didn't anticipate it vibrating and weirding me out therefore making me let go and get my hand peed on.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
The moment when you and your BFF compare frequently used emojis and realize you have similar mental disorders and a really weak alibi.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
I had a dream that I was smoking rasberries out of a bong. THEY WEREN'T EVEN DRIED...
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