yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
My boss just called me into his office to apologize for being an "inadvertant cockblock"
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
It was like getting head from an anaconda
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
I feel like the fact that I slept with someone who dresses up like Batman a few times will never be lived down.
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
We were driving past a farm when he screamed at me to stop the car, then he jumped out and tried to ride a cow.
the funny thing was, all i remember was a liter of vodka and going to oneonta for the night. then 2 weeks later bam, i get a letter banning me from campus for the next 4 years. awesome convorsation with my dad to wake up to.
I've struck affair-gold. He's hot, he's ripped, he doesn't want a relationship, and most importantly he won't have to ask Gods permission to bang me like the last religious nut job did.
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