Between the two of us weve fucked every guy at this table
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
He made me keep his swollen nut cold with frozen bags of peas while rubbing his tummy because he said I had no choice.
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
i cant believe the cop was fine with you saying no we are in a hurry when he asked to search your car
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