I'd wear matching sweaters with you
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
New record: 45 minutes. Afterwards I played We Are The Champions while we cuddled.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
FYI, his "son" is a Chihuahua.
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