did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
I just wanna lay in my bed all bundled up as have someone feed me lettuce
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Things were easy when he was just a penis. Now he's a penis with feelings.
Can I just have sex with him and then never talk to him? I need him to be the Mr. Miyagi of my sex life.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I met his parents. We played twister. My boob popped out.
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
I'm sexting with a 20 year old that has a foot fetish... This is what Sailor Jerry drives me to do.
I just matched the dude who's car I rear ended 2 years ago on tinder. I don't think he remembers.
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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