Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
I'm passing your future prison.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
You know when you can feel the alcohol in your toes? That's a great feeling.
You paid at the door and they gave you a straw for the kiddie pool full of booze.
After a bit there were two girls who got naked and liquor wrestled. I don't think it was planned.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
Randomize
