I accidentally threw away from slim jim and some lady saw me dig it out of the garbage. It was unopened but still, I look so homeless.
im stripping for him via video chat, but the sound is turned off cause his students are taking a test
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
The story about him having a girlfriend changed real fast when he found out that I was a gymnast
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
As far as drugs go, alcohol has all the elegance and precision of hitting yourself in the head with a hammer.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I feel like im becoming the girl who only drunk texts him. I would be in the dog house, if situations like this had dog houses.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize