I swear if I see one more guy in a v-neck and fedora I'm going to punch someone in the balls. This is philly, you're not supposed to look like Ryan Cabrera
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You need to get here now. Before they realize I'm not puerto rican.
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
I was not drunk. There was Star Wars, sex, and baby oil.
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
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