garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
Oh man I wish you'd been in the car w/ me today. I followed a school bus home filled w/ young boys and I flipped them off the entire way. They loved it.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Any idea who the guy in my bed tagged as rattlesnake dick might be?
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I was puking in the bathroom when my fake tooth fell off of my retainer so I just walked out of the bar and didn't say goodbye to my date
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
I feel like I could get pregnant watching Zac Efron do yard work in this movie
I tried to take a cute nude but sneezed halfway through. I sent it anyway
I'm happy I peed in your laundry basket last night
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Why do I like him? He literally has no redeeming qualities.
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
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