That arnold schwarzeneger picture looks strikingly similar to paul
Not half as good looking as paul
I'd say paul has bigger bicep peaks, but who am I to judge
He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
What's a "vodkaffle"?
It's where she puts vodka in the waffle mix.
will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Found my bra in the fridge. See you in 10 mins. It's gonna be a good fuckin day!
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
