This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
im going to pretend im pregnant so i can eat a lot then i will accidentally fall down the stairs
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
new level of vanity: sex dreams about deep throating myself...
That reminds me...we need to get swords
my left tit made it into the crop job on your profile pic, I knew it was good for other things
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
It's been two dates and she just invited me to her aunts funeral. I can't even. Who the fuck does that? I need to drink I'm coming to get you in 5
yeah, never be friends with someone with shitty eyebrows.. they obviously already make poor life choices
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
I can't control his boners. I can only encourage them.
I was totes going to lose it to him last night, but I cried and we ate mexican food instead.
Randomize
