We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
i'm thankful for my girlfriend's hot cousins....god, i love her family parties.
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I think when she wakes up, she'll either kill me, or laugh. I hope she laughs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Don't ever give your dog some hamburger at midnight. Its impossible to enjoy a late night burger when your dog just threw it up all over your carpet. Gremlin rules work with dogs.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it too early in the day to ask a nipple-related question?
Everyone's impressed that I actually got pee all over his car since I'm a girl and they're a little curious..
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
Well start with a list of things you don't want to do... Like maybe 1) I don't want join Isis. That's a good start.
I FUCKED THE WRONG FRIEND HELP ME
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
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