You and i never got to the, we dont care what we look like friend-stage. you know? like not brushing your teeth stage.
sorry im really high
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I tried to tell her I've only slept with 3 other people...she then named off 5 of her sorority sisters I fucked and asked me if she should continue
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
DOGS JUST TOTALLY ATE THE FEATHERS OFF MY NIPPLE CLAMPS!!!
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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