Needless to say when I told my parents they loved me less
I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
you pissed in a zip-loc bag and wanted 60 dollars for it
he's dressed up as spiderman, i don't understand why he's crying.
I don't want her to kill herself before she gets over me, getting mentioned in a suicide note isn't very fly.
but it's kind of a high honor.
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
I gave you chlamydia, you gave me a concussion. Now we're even.
It's official. My little brother has had more sex in my car than I have. I'm still tied with my little sister. I hate everybody.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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