Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
Tell us when you see the semi truck on fire.
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Just got physical proof that at 6 am i was running around with raw potatoes threatening to mash them on his floor. Hello, Mobile uploads
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
Batteries died. I don't care that you're studying for the bar. Come over. Bring the law books and study after. I'll even make coffee.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
My last memory of last night was being in a laundry room doing blow and admiring a washer and dryer... I think that's the earmark of old age
I've literally slept one hour I'm honestly just surprised you can insult me this early
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