i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
I didn't know it was possible to make picking up dog shit look sexy.
She did the bend and snap...
You need Jesus. Or a midol and a snickers. Whichever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
fun fact of the day: the man setting up my checking account at my bank has thrown up on my front lawn.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
Did you just say he wants to put a baby inside me?
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When he texted me, I got a little wet. Until he asked me to get Jimmy Johns before I got to his house.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
Can you confirm that you aren't dead?
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