Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
I was worried if he didn't show me his penis, he would kill himself
the worst part of it wasnt him peeing on the xbox. it was when he showed me his penis and made a kissy face at me. THAT was painful.
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
They shouted last call and the guy next to me and I looked each other up and down and went in unison "yup, you'll do"
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I thought we agreed to no sexting at the school bake sale...
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