dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
he busted in while i was showering looked at me and said "youve lost weight bro, no homo" and started puking into the sink
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
dude, I'm passing out in the fifth floor janitors closet. Let me know when the rooms opened back up
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
i draw the line when you ask for directions at a place you're already at.
WHAT KIND OF DUMPSTER DOESNT HAVE PIZZA IN IT?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
As planned I took it to the limit. Then we met a new limit. Now they are limit friends.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
i realized my signature handshake has now become a hookup. i love what college has done to me.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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