my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
there were like 150 questions AFTER the application. you'd think for a store that has dick molding kits it'd be a joke
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
"He was so not worth staining my backseat for."
The bachelor party was supposed to stay local but I think were in mexico.
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
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