After last night, I could never be a politician.
Who were the five players on the alien team from space jam?
Lady next to me is getting american flags airburshed on her nails. god bless the ghetto.
And you kept hanging up and calling back because you thought I wasn't greeting you properly.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
then she said she was half-a-virgin and that she would appreciate it if i would finish what her old booty call started
AND WHAT FELONIES DID I MISS OUT ON WHILE SLUMBERING!?
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
she passed out standing next to the car. her head hit the door so hard the alarm went off. she instantly snapped out of it and started sprinting away
I mean she's doing calculus in her head to prove how NOT drunk she is.
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