You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
she smelled like a LAN party
Black Friday shoppers are ridiculous. I think I just watched a marriage end.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
I heard that if you win you get to have sex with me. You guys really need to stop wagering my vagina.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Randomize
