everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
this isnt the first time ive seen her dressed as abe lincoln
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've decided, even as much fun as it sounds, I don't care for his sodomy box.
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
I was gonna start crying but as he was asking me for my info i saw him eyeing my rack. So I sorta started pushing them together. He asked me to get out of the car he made me turn around so he could check me out and then he said and I quote "okay ma'am. Everything is fine, I'm going to let you off with a warning. Next time if you're not wearing yoga pants you might not be as lucky" I am blessed.
Wow two curved penises in one weekend. I feel like this may be good luck. Like finding a four leaf clover
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
My boss just texted me, clearly drunk, and said get down here pronto with a handle of rum, 50 lbs. of cold cuts, and a BB gun. This is not why I went to law school.
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
Randomize