all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
answered a 6 am booty call this morning...you were still in the er so I thought what the hell
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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