So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
About me waking up with a tatto of a hamster with a top hat ?
hey.....beach week happens
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
Its weird to pet your cat with a boner
What the fuck?
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Got robbed by knifepoint. Then got sympathy Bj. I might have to walk down Austin ave drunk every weekend
You need a Jiminy Cricket, but for sexual decisions.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
After we finished having sex, he drunkenly tried to hugh five me, farted, then accused me of stealing his socks.
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
