I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
They're tearing apart the house I lost my virginity in:(
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
You were carrying a 6 ft lamp that we stole on your back yelling "OHANA MEANS FAMILY AND FAMILY MEANS NOBODY GETS LEFT BEHIND"
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
I think getting right with the Lord should involve more than me and a bottle of tequila.
I'm wearing a fleece onesie eating pop tarts on the train to work. Killing it.
He's watching Always Sunny and eating refried beans straight from the can.
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize
