Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
Dude Carly, it's like, inconvinent how often you cause me to have an erection
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
only 4 hours until nug lovin time
excuse me?
nug lovin. lovin nugs.
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