the sex was like sticking it in a jar of mayonnaise
So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
I got tired of walking to the bathroom that I decided to throw up in a cup. I now have 3 cups full of vomit on top of my mini fridge
Look dude, you cant keep blaming everything on the new years party. Its february...
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In all seriousness, if tomorrow night becomes a heated game of Which Ex Gets To Take The Plastered Birthday Girl Home, I'm going to bow out with my integrity intact.
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
If graduating leads me to stop getting naked at inappropriate times in public places I'm going to be pissed
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
I just saw a fat girl roll down the steps taking out three people with her, thought you should know.....
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
But we have bathrooms and they dont
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