How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
dude sorry but u no that when a guys 'likes' ur pic on facebook it only means he was just jacking off to it.
I woke up to his little sister feeling me up. I guess it's time to meet the family.
the amount of times i have wished for a boxed wine emoticon is almost alarming. almosttt
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
Thing I said while arguing: I want to be single again so that I can have pizza and dick rained down upon me.
Pulling out all the stops on being a lady.
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
He told me he loved me and then peed his own bed. So at least it was a memorable one night stand.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
Because I'm sitting in a bath of my own wisdom and drowning my sorrows in coconut rum
Fucking adderall I just talked at the security guard for 90 minutes
He just got really stoned and kept complementing my ponytail
Randomize
