bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
So we tried to 69 with him on top. NEVER TRY IT. His balls were in my eyes and it was terrifying.
I may have just googled Muppet Treasure Island drinking game
i must've hopped out the car and eaten some leaves...even when your'e drunk that's not acceptable
I hope the walls stop moving before my manager notices that i'm still drunk.
I put an asterick after the names of people in my phone that I've fucked. Both as a form of bragging, and also so I can actually remember all their names.
Well his ex just grabbed his dick and told him yep Ill call u later
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Neighbour is sobbing. Difficult to masturbate.
suburban family judging/laughing at us after Jenna just pulled two flasks out of her boot on the subway
Took my nervous poop earlier then expected it's gonna be a good day
Randomize
