haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
Apparently 151 is to me what spinach is to popeye.
He gave them shots of purell and called it "acid rain" jello shots. They took them.
I hate freshman.
Just walked out of my apartment and came face to face with a shirtless dude playing with his balls and trying to tie his shoes.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I think being an adult is being able to say no to free shots...I need to work on that.
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
I'm actually not sure I need to run today, between the crazy monkey sex and breaking into my own house.
Sorry, I am not your wing girl tonight,. in my pjs, eating cereal from the box. Hell I only shaved the inside of my legs just so they wouldn't itch. Not happening.
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
I DONT UNDERSTAND NIPPLES. THEY JUST POP OUT FOR NO REASON
Well somebody's had a rough day, nipple-wise
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
Heard I spat fire in your face last night. Wish I could say that I'm sorry
House vote, we're revoking your 151 privileges
I'm sorry.
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
