Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
a fat lady just tried to bring a cooler stuffed full with burger kid through airport security. christ I'm going to miss the midwest.
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
We were thinking he might be gay. Like how the fuck do you not even make out with a girl that made you a grilled cheese
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
You know you are 86'd from the legacy right? You can't down shots then spike the shot glass
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
My new successful method of booty calling is sending a screencap of a map with the shortest route from their location to mine highlighted.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I can't open my mouth wide enough to make full use of this snapchate update
Bro, she said she wanteo to fuck me with my white Nike cap on so I resemble a douchebag. I think my choice of women might be coming into question
So help me God.... if he sends me a dick pic.... I will make it so he has to eat food through a tube in his nose and poop into a bag by his belly button
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
Checked my bank account this morning...apparently I went to 7-11 at 4am and spent $22 on taquitos. New all time low for me.
I ate all of them. New all time low for ME.
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