sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
My dad assaulted a TSA agent this morning. Shut down airport security. Don't tell me that your family is embarrassing.
college "breaks" should be renamed "reminder why you left your hell hole of a life in the first place"
You act like this is the first time i've fingered two 17 year olds at the same time
I have fifteen cents in cash and 80 cents in the bank. BUT I have weed.
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Hunting for men at chipotle... I feel like I should be more disappointed that this is the way my life is going but I'm really just excited for the potential.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
I'm bonding with your girlfriend. I like her. We're plotting your demise.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
I just spontaneously learned how to embroider at three in the morning.
I also almost burned the house down in the process. Don't ask me how. It's a long story.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
Of course you try to burn the house down on the one night we take down the smoke alarm so we can use the fog machine more
Randomize
