Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
doctors was a success... no liver damage and I lost five pounds.. we're celebrating tonight you get the whiskey I'll get the burritos.
I just fist bumped God in my head for last night. What a bro.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
Okay, yeah, judgmental guy at 7/11. I'm buying g wine at 10:20 in the morning. You wanna fight about it?
Your grandma found me sleeping in my car this morning, and she wanted me to tell you she was going to church... Also, last night was amazing.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Randomize
