i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
For u too. Could be years before u have a finger in ur ass
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Is there like a dick file on me? Guys can't hold two dicks anymore?! Who are you people????
If its not for food we ain't going out.
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Randomize
