cruising supermarkets, asking random people where i can get weed. fuck alaska
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
That's always how I imagine things at your apartment...
Good, I'm glad you don't have some weird, skewed, clothed version of reality over here.
I am literally drinking 7 day old water and looking for snacks in my room so I won't have to go in the hall and see roommate, because we accidentally banged last night. Please bring over some chicken and plan b.
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
