Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
dude your girlfriend loves you alot..she yelled your name lastnight in bed
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
I didn't plan on sleeping with him until he told me his mom is deaf.. Then I felt bad.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
Taking my infected piercing out in the parking lot of the food card place. This is one of those life defining moments that makes me sad.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
i have a raging boner for Saturday, day drinking is one of my top favorite things right next to alligator wrestling and blowing shit up
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Whatever. I'll take my new fine ass dick sucking nails elsewhere.
Anybody can graduate from college sober. You try it while being stoned every day for the last three years. 2.75 baby.
Randomize
