Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
When we woke up, I asked if we could play "what does your name rhyme with".....he said 'bave' thank god it was easy
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
You'd be surprised at how many crooked penises are out there
There are 3 guys sitting in the elevator in lawn chairs wearing sunglasses and holding beers. the hallway rugs are stuffed in a trash can. i've never been so glad to be sober.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
