Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I just stuffed five dollars in my near empty box of camels to remind myself to buy more. And my mom says I don't budget my money
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
i was super drunk. to the point where i was putting shredded cheese on a fork, putting hot sauce on it then dipping it in salsa. it was awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
You're such a good friend. You send me pictures of your boobs when I'm sad. I will always appreciate that.
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
i could only love him more if he was covered in glitter.
QUIT STEALING MY PHONE AND SEXTING MY MOM!!!!
Randomize