Bel-fucking-mar, this place has more popped collars than a Hollister catalog
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
i am one more weekend without sex away from dosing him with viagra and locking ourselves into a closet.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
its so sad we are done celebrating 21st bdays everytime one of us turned 21 everyone else got laid
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Randomize