I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
Do vagina's smell?
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Is it bad that on the course evaluation it said "do you normally try harder than other students in class" and i circled "absolutely false"?
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
Also when they left they could only find one sock between the two of them. Apparently we're like crazy sock ripping vixens when we bring guys home drunk
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
She gave us all a pep talk at the bus stop at 1 AM. It involved cupcakes and somehow ended with her making out with her best friend. God bless college.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
Yeah, nothing like barfing into a grocery bag you just put dog shit into.
Guess who just hooked up with a guy who was wearing a shirt from his mom's "dress up closet"?!
Who’s got two thumbs and just got laid in the administration building?
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
What should I list for life skills
How about home wrecking? You’re excellent at that
Hmm...that is a life skill in Southern California
Randomize
