My room smells like vodka and shame
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
we've called him dos banos ever since he threw up in 2 separate bathrooms with the same puke
My clit ring got caught in his beard. Never. Again.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I'm high. Everything has a 45° angle. That is as far as my eyes open
Woke up at noon, still drunk, naked, with another girl next to me. When she wakes up, I'm gonna have my SECOND lesbian experience with her. How's your 2015 going?
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
They're giving you narcotics aren't they?
If I offered to share would you come visit me?
My last one night stand called me today. Apparently I gave him a yeast infection in his mouth. Not sure how I should feel about this.
Randomize
