yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
on the bus. saw a kid get off at a red light, puke on the sidewalk, and get back on.
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
She swung at the pinata with crutches
You can't be mad because the taco bell people like me and not you. I'm not the one that puked in front of them.
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I was his one phone call from jail and I hung up on him. He's fine though were gonna go to a party now.
this is an emotional support booty call
He just pulled his sweatpants down and pissed in the middle of our garden
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize
