you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'm going on a nature/throwup walk. Don't lock me out of the apartment.
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
But he buys me breakfast and goes down on me THATS HARD TO FIND
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Just got a blow job from a woman on a ski slope. She said ski'ing frightens her and giving head calms her down. Glad I could help ma'am!
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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